News for Thought - 10/29/07

Mailbox Hit By Meteorite Sells for $83,000

NEW YORK -- Two of the world's most famous meteorites failed to attract buyers at an auction Sunday, while an ordinary metal mailbox in Georgia zapped by a falling space rock in 1984 was sold for the unearthly price of nearly $83,000. The small piece was offered at auction by Darryl Pitt, curator of the Macovich Collection, the world's largest collection of space rocks, who traded the museum a Martian rock for the Willamette chip in 1998. In spirited bidding, the mailbox -- somewhat the worse for the experience but with its red metal flag still bravely in the "up" position -- went to an unidentified bidder for $82,750 including the buyer's premium of 20 percent. A tiny piece of the rock itself, less than an ounce, went for $7,700.


Dog Steps On Gun, Wounds Hunter

TAMA, Iowa -- A Tama man was injured when hunting dogs stepped on his gun. Officials with the Iowa Department of Natural Resources said James Harris, 37, was pheasant hunting with a group about three miles north of Grinnell when the accident happened.Officials said the group had shot a bird and when Harris went to retrieve it, he put his gun on the ground and crossed a fence. As he crossed the fence, hunting dogs stepped on his gun causing it to fire.

Harris was shot in the lower left leg. The investigation is continuing.

Police: Man Wanted Sex With Corpse

TAMPA, Fla. -- A Gulf Coast man was taken into custody over the weekend for what police said was a plan to kill man and have sex with the body. Police said Kevin Wade Daley, 50, of Citrus Springs was arrested and charged with criminal solicitation to commit first-degree murder in connection with the plot. Citrus County sheriff's officials said they were tipped off by a friend of Daley who said he was alarmed when he heard of the suspect's plans. Police searched Daley's home and confiscated his computer.Officers said Daley discussed his intentions to have sex with a corpse during phone conversations.

Dueling Romeos

A man can under no circumstances, ever get into a physical altercation over a girl. It should never even enter the adult male mind to possibly fight another dude in an attempt to win the affections of a female.
It's ok to fight as a last resort inasmuch as it goes towards the defense of your wife, or maybe even your girlfriend depending on the circumstances, but if she's not your girl, don't be a dumbass.
I thought this went without saying, but once again being in this tiny biologically experimental fish-bowl called law school in Carlisle, Pennsylvania, where all sorts of wild varieties of odd-looking flamboyant species go to great lengths to demonstrate their social ineptitude, I find myself disappointed in my fellow human beings.
I was told the other day that this exact scenario actually happened. A fisticuff scuffle between two first-year law students at the local bar. They actually fought over who was gonna get her. I can only imagine what the dialogue was like that fanned the flames that ultimately boiled over into this final act of stupidity. Whatever it was, broken down into its simplest units of idiocy it must have been something like this.

"I want her, she's mine."
"No way, I saw her first."
"Let's fight!"
"Ok!"

Now you can use your imagination to envision a geeky-looking fight between two fellas who spend their days on gmail chat while they're in class supposedly learning about proper citation formats and the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure.
This kind of shit just can't be allowed to happen anywhere! Have we learned nothing about life in the 10,000 years of modern man? Are we really still basically cavemen that just happened to figure out how to make pyramids, the steam-engine, television, the internet, and Starbucks?
Don't EVER fight over a girl, it doesn't make sense no matter how drunk you are. There's too many of them, more than enough to go around, and sadly more than enough that will happily do just that.
At the end of the story it seemed to be suggested to me that to my amazement, the female in question has actually selected the "winner" of the "fight" to be her mate-of-the-moment.
I plead to any young women reading this, please don't ever condone this ridiculous behavior. You CAN NOT pick a guy who got into a bar fight over you. It's just retarded, and if you do, know that you are part of the problem. You are taking us all back in time, many millenia to the days when a man could just pick a girl, render her unconscious with the nearest blunt object and drag her back to the bachelor-cave for a little of the old in-out. This was an amoral, lawless society that is best left in our past. Ironically enough, in this case it was perpetrated by two future duly appointed defenders of the law, who just seemed to forget pretty much everything for one night. Let's all try to keep this from happening anymore.

Brian Billick

Brian Billick might be the worst coach in the history of the NFL to ever win a Super Bowl. I have maintained this since the year after they won it. He has produced a consistently inconsistent team, and an unstable, boring, predictable, generally ineffective offense since he has arrived in Baltimore.
The defense was good before he got here, and he has had little to do with the success on that side of the ball, but even the defensive dominance has started to fade as teams have learned that all they have to do to win is get rid of the ball quickly and avoid turnovers, put up 2 or 3 scores of any variety, and the impotent offense won't be able to make up the difference. This is a simple recipe for defeating the Ravens, and now the whole league knows it, from the Bills to the Browns, good thing we don't play the Raiders this season. We have the talent at every position except quarterback, but even that's no excuse because the Bills proved that you can beat an elite defense with two rookie playmakers in the backfield. Sooner or later, the coach has to be held accountable, he's coasted for 7 years off of one Super Bowl victory, it's over now. Time is up, the thrill is gone, as should be Brian Billick. I plead with Ravens ownership to free us fans from the burden placed on us every single Sunday of viewing a talented team constantly achieve nothing above mediocrity. Brian Billick is the antithesis of a good NFL coach, his team is consistently unprepared to play football on Sunday, see him out the door.

News for Thought

Whenever I find myself extremely bored, my new thing to do is to take a look at the US news headlines on cnn.com. This is some of the most bizarre shit I've ever seen, and further proof that everyone is slowly going crazy. Here are just a few things I saw that I thought were noteworthy.

Woman Finds Naked Stranger In Bed

HAZEL PARK, Mich. -- A woman returned home to find a naked stranger asleep in her bed in her Hazel Park home. Police said the man had been drinking and had blood alcohol level of 0.17 percent, the Daily Tribute reported.The woman said the man offered her $14 and some marijuana for sex.The man said he was told the woman was a call girl. She denied those accusations, but said she was a waitress at an adult night club.

Man Using Samurai Sword Seeks Revenge on Wrong Person, Victim Loses Finger

MILWAUKEE -- A drunk samurai sword-wielding man seeking revenge on a former friend had the wrong apartment when he attacked a man and severed the victim's pinky finger Sunday morning, police said.

Homeowner Offers Burglar Breakfast

SAN ANTONIO -- A man said he had a heart-to-heart conversation with an armed burglar over a cup of coffee after he found him stealing his belongings from his home on Sept. 11. "I said, 'What are you doing here?'" Swanson said. "He said, 'I'm taking your stuff and it's too bad you showed up.'" Swanson said he gave the burglar all the money in his wallet and offered to listen to his problems over breakfast.He said Hernandez told him he couldn't pay his bills or afford to buy food for himself.Swanson said he ended their conversation with a prayer and a hug.

Hungry Man Rips Head Off Duck

Wisconsin -- Members of an upscale retirement community reported seeing a drunken man staggering around a duck pond in the building's garden. When confronted the man grabbed a duck and stated "I'm hungry, I'm gonna eat it." Then proceeded to yank the ducks head off of its body before beginning to chew on the wriggling neck. He was later arrested and charged with misdemeanor intoxication and felony animal cruelty.